My 10 year old daughter recently finished playing flag football. She had never played before but a friend asked her to play.

I was curious if she’d like it. Turns out she loved it!

I was thinking about that in light of this recent comment I saw from Mavericks’ superstar Luka Doncic:

After reading that, I am convinced I know one reason she had so much fun playing flag. . . because the only purpose was fun!

There was no pressure. 

Winning and losing wasn’t a big deal.

Personal performance wasn’t important (other than putting forth a good effort).

It was simply a chance for her and her friends to play a game and have fun.

Unfortunately, those opportunities are getting fewer and fewer for kids in 2025.

The Well Intentioned But Ill Conceived Thoughts Of Many Parents

Many of us (and I’ve been guilty of this, too) can accidentally take the fun out of sports for our kids.

How? By putting so much pressure on them.

I get it. When I watch my girls play, I want to see them play well. When they don’t, it can be hard as a parent. I don’t come down on them, but they are incredibly perceptive and can pick up on subtle cues.

When that happens, it takes the enjoyment out of sports (for both them and me). If it’s all about winning and points, it’s not going to be a good experience.

That doesn’t mean it’s a free for all. You can and should still expect your child to do their best, be a good teammate, and be coachable. But it does mean we don’t have to get so wrapped up in every game, practice and workout.

We’d be better served remembering that sports is about learning lessons and growing as people. And those lessons and growth won’t take place if they quit because they aren’t having fun.

As I watched her play flag, I realized how much I was able to just relax and enjoy watching her. My challenge is to adopt that same attitude with all her sports this year. I know if I can, it will have a positive impact on her and the rest of our family.

So as we get into 2025, let’s acknowledge our role in our child’s experience - to be their biggest fan, to offer help (when appropriate), and to model a process-oriented focus.

If we can do that, we will help ensure they have a blast and want to continue playing.

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